I don't wear an apron when I cook. Mostly because I don't, you know, cook. If I was going to wear an apron though, I think it would have to be this one:
I can totally see me swanning around the kitchen in this banging pots and pans and waving wooden spoons around. Not actually cooking mind, although I could be convinced to whip up a batch of cocktails simply to complete the look!
The aprons by Boojiboo on Etsy feature a sweetheart neckline, fitted bust and circle skirt and come in a huge range of gorgeous fabrics. Who cares if you don't cook - wear one of these, dust some flour on your nose, hide the takeaway containers, use your best serving dishes and no one will ever know.